A view from the other end

This morning started like any other Thursday morning for me.  The kids and I woke up, I fed them the usual breakfast, they played a little while I got their tennis and swimming gear ready.  I even managed to do my Bible Study homework.

And then off I went to drop off my son to his cute tennis tot lesson.  I stopped by the grocery store to get some meat my husband and chef needed for the weekend guests and then picked up my daughter at home, to pick up my son at tennis, to go to swimming classes.

Everything seemed normal.  Samuel was enjoying his swimming class.  Sarah was crying as usual for the first 10 minutes.  I started reading a book on my iphone.  Every now and then I looked at how the kids were doing.

Class over.  Off to pick them up and dry them up.

And as we were still in the pool, I feel a hand touch my back.  I look back and a lady with a boy (I assumed her son) were standing there.  She then told me to please tell my son to stop pushing her son into the water during class.  That it was not nice.  That the teacher saw it too (as if I would not believe her?).

I guess I was in shock.  Did not see this coming.  Sarah is calling me to help her with her slippers.  I can't even remember if I said anything to her in response.

She then left and it was as if someone else had taken over me.  I started asking Samuel if he in fact pushed the kid into the water.  Why?  Did you?  Why?  Why would you Samuel?  Don't ever do that again...

And as the kids started their showers this woman's words began to sink in.

Of course I had a chat with Samuel while we changed clothes.  He apologized to me.   I think he was more traumatized seeing me so upset than anything.

I took a deep breath. And then I told myself to stop taking it on my son.

I was embarrassed.  I was thinking about how I responded and wondering what that mother might be thinking about me...But I think more than anything....I was embarrassed.

And as I drove off to go home, I was still bothered by this.  I was still feeling embarrassed.

And then I realized God had a lesson for me.

You see, this morning, I was reading about a man named Saul (a.k.a. Paul) in the Bible (Acts 9)  How he turned from persecutor of Christians to follower of Christ.  I read about how he saw Jesus on his way to Damascus and how he was blinded by a light.  I reflected on what that 'blindness' meant to him physically, emotionally and physically, and how he must have felt once his blindness was healed by God via Ananias.

This encounter at the swimming pool showed me a kind of blindness I had, and Jesus lifted that blindness from me this morning.

I don't know about you, but I don't often get complaints from teachers or parents about my kids, so this was a big deal to me.  I have, on the other hand, been critical of other parents in the past.  Often times I do not say anything but I know God looks at my heart and yes, I have been critical.

And though I might still be right in my observations, God was reminding me that I needed to understand what a mother or father feels when someone else talks to them about something their own son or daughter did.  The shame and the embarrassment.  The rush of emotions.  How hard it is to 'get over it'.

This morning I had a view of an experience I have experienced in the past...but this time my view was from the other end.

And it was not as easy to take when you are on the other side.

I had to ask God for forgiveness right there.  For my insensitivity.  For my lack of compassion.  For my pride.

May God give me the grace I need.  May God continue to change me to truly find affirmation of who I am in Him, and not in what people might think of me (as a woman, parent, etc).  May God give me kind and loving words when words need to be said of something I see that needs to be addressed - that I will not forget that righteousness does not mean a lack of love, sensitivity and care.  May He strip away any trace of pride in me and replace it with His love.


Jesus, thanks for letting me see and feel today what it's like when one is on the 'other side'...and yes...could you help me help Samuel not to push kids into the water too? :D