Live Out Loud - Adventures of a mom

I was completely exhausted.  I had never experienced so much change, so fast, so soon.  I did not know what to do, how to react to it all.  I was frazzled, perplexed, weary.  I was increasingly feeling smaller and smaller, less and less capable.  I was mad at myself for not being more 'prepared' for this. I looked at the source of my exhaustion -  he had turned my world literally upside down overnight.  Such a tiny thing.  So much power over me. "He" was my 2 day old baby.   I had been a mother for 48 hours. I vaguely remember the highs and lows of the pregnancy.  It seemed like a decade ago that I was in the delivery room.  I already miss the effects of the epidural - which allowed me to sleep and rest before the final push.  But all of those things seem like just flashes from long ago now. All I knew was what I was feeling right here, right now -- physical pain post delivery and physical and emotional exhaustion from having been in labour for 24 hours, fol

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go. ( NIV ) Lately God has been teaching me about Courage.  I have been wondering what 'courage' really means, where it comes from, who has it and who doesn't, why, what circumstances seem to require more of it, what happens when we don't seem to have it... Have you ever thought of that? God told me to focus on this word as I was preparing to go on my mommy-daughter trip to Vancouver a couple of weeks ago.  At the time all I understood was that: 1)  I needed COURAGE to speak up about my faith while I was in Vancouver.  This time God did not just want me to live out my faith, but to have the courage to speak up BOLDLY, as the Spirit led, when I felt someone needed to hear simply that they needed Jesus. But as if that was not enough, though, as I embarked on the trip, I learned God had much mo