Nail clippers, bathrooms and such
- Nail clippers -- which ones are best? How to best clip them when they are young? At what point do you teach them to clip their own??? HOW?
- Washrooms (READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION!)-- I especially had questions as I potty trained my son. Aside from the actual pee and poo (yes, sorry if you are offended but I am a mom of 2 young kids), what is the actual step by step process? I mean, what is that hole in men's and boys' underwear for? Do you raise the toilet seat first or pull off your pants first? Girls can wipe with toilet paper...what do boys do? How do you hold...you know what to 'direct' flow? I searched and searched for books to help me guide my son but there was none. Everything was so general I didn't need a book for it.
And...when do you let go and let your kids go to the washroom all by themselves without needing to check front and back???
- Related to this - I had to go through each motion when I went to the washroom before I trained my kids to do it on their own. I mean....what are the steps I follow? And...how do you pull up and down your pants and underpants???
- Put on a jacket. Sounds simple? For the life of me I could not figure out how to help my child. I suppose for some this comes naturally, but not for my kid. Thank God for his teacher. The trick? Place jacket hood first, by then the jacket will be 'hanging' behind you. Then the sleeves. Then zip up.
- Which leads me to the next thing...zippers. Not easy for a 2 or 3 year old!!!! (not mine at least) Which brands are better? I found some jackets have impossible zippers! Then, breaking down each step - which hand to hold which part before zipping...Yes, a learning curve
- Washing face and hands - those are not hard...the hard part? How do you dry the face towel? It is always soaking wet! The kids simply do not have enough strength to do it!
- Showering. When do you move them from bath time to shower time? When do you start separating siblings who have been growing up bathing together? My son hates to shower and prefers to bathe but it's time to move on son....but it is a pain to watch him shower as a perfectionist mom. Nothing seems clean at the end of the cycle. How do you break it down? I am almost tempted to draw him a chart: count to 5 each time you rub a body part. Start with head, neck, arms, body, etc. etc.
- Holding a pencil - this surprisingly came naturally to my kids - how about yours? I had to correct it somewhat but nah - too much work. They are holding a pen...they are writing. (by the way, same goes with holding any eating utensil!)
My point? We seem to focus so much on teaching our kids NEW skills - giving them MORE opportunities in life...and sometimes perhaps...Just perhaps...they need parents and adults around him interested in teaching and showing them how REGULAR life happens...These skills are learned but how can they learn if we sort of assume they should just 'get it' so that we can take them to that tennis, swimming, math, piano, Tae-Kwon-Doe, violin, hockey or whatever class they have on their schedule?
To be fair, my first point on not being able to find books - it's just a way to introduce the subject...because, after all, I don't think any books will and can teach us how to do these things. But what does help? Having a support group of like-minded parents who are going through or have gone through similar stages in life. Just like feeding and sleep training, there is no single right answer (is there anything in parenting that is???) but at least for me, I'm just glad I have a bunch of mommies willing to listen to me ask them about the sequence of steps a boy goes through when he pees!
Comments
It's funny because I don't remember learning a lot of these skills...but I do remember being sent to shower and not being sure about the process as a child, and just kind of trial-and-error learning it as I went. I'd like to say I do know how to shower now! And I wasn't taught a lot of basics,(they had my two younger siblings right when I was reaching the age of semi-independence which went very quickly to full independence) but I learned, somehow, even to cook, do basic hygiene, etc. very early. So I think even when the parents aren't sure or don't cover all the bases, things are okay. I always knew they loved me, and that's what matters even today. I think you're an amazing momma, because you love your kiddies and love God and you want that for them too, and that's what will always matter to them most.
I love that you're always very frank about the joys and pains =) And that when it's my turn to trial-and-error my way through parenting, I'll know there are women like you out there who've been there before me.