From mundane to momentous
When was the last time you...
- refilled your home's washrooms' toilet paper?
- cleaned the washroom?
- vacuumed?
- refilled the salt and sugar containers in the kitchen?
- folded your clothes after washing them?
- washed and changed your bed sheets?
- washed your house curtains?
- watered the lawn?
- refilled the soap and/or dish detergent?
Think of the last time you went to Costco/your local supermarket...What did you buy there? Aside from food...when was the last time you bought:
- pepper?
- soy sauce?
- oil?
- dish and laundry detergent?
- toilet paper?
- garbage bags (if you are like us, where we are required to use biodegradable ones)?
- toothpaste
I ask because lately I've notice these 'mundane' things I seem to do in an endless cycle...and these are things we can easily take for granted. Yes, we might do the laundry from time to time...but who makes sure the detergent is always there? Yes, we might refill the toilet paper when we need to...but who makes sure there is toilet paper in the closet? Yes, we might cook a meal or two...but who makes sure all the condiments are nicely available in the kitchen?
Sometimes I spend a day cleaning, washing and folding and sometimes I wonder..."will my husband notice the sheets are cleaner, the curtains are fresher looking and that every dispenser and bottle in the house is full of its contents?"
...and I admit, when he does notice...it is as if I had gotten a promotion at work!
But in the process of learning what it takes to keep a household running I have learned to not only appreciate my mom's job as I was growing up, but also the skills my parents taught me in the process...
You see, I think sometimes I as a parent focus so much on giving my kids opportunities to learn 'important' skills in life such as reading, writing, piano, swimming, etc., that it would be so easy to miss out on these other 'small' yet very important skills in life.
The other day I asked my husband, who is a wonderful handyman - "Who taught you how to fix lights? install faucets and build planters?"
...and then I realized someone else could easily ask me the same type of question - "Who taught you how to sew, mend, wash and clean the washroom with such speed?"
The answer -- observing our parents -- and in many occasions, being either told to do what they were doing and/or given the opportunities to do it.
Our parents might not have had college degrees -- some of our parents did not even have a High School Diploma. But they knew something - we, their kids, needed skills in life beyond formal education. They knew we will one day need to know the price of toilet paper because toilet paper always runs out in the house. They knew we will need to know how to wash and fold our clothes. They knew we will need to know how to clean a washroom and what products to use. They knew we would need to contribute to the welfare of the home...
...so now I think of my own kids....have I taken the time to guide them? the opportunity to try these skills in a safe environment? the chance to observe me instead of asking them to play with the neighbour while I do these things?
It takes time, patience (a lot of it!!!) and determination...but I suppose I need to remind myself...I am not only wanting to get these tasks done...I want to instil in my kids an appreciation of what HOME really means, of RESPONSIBILITY and OWNERSHIP, and to coach and train them to be well rounded people.
Even if they end up doing 'well' in life and are able to hire help, I hope they appreciate what maids, nannies, janitors and chefs do. When they see the janitor at the office at the end of their day, I hope they would have the decency to thank them for those 'small' jobs. That when they refill their coffees in the office kitchen I hope they will realize someone had to refill the jar they use. Even if there is someone who washes their coffee cups, I hope they will take the 30 seconds it takes to clean their own and maybe even whatever is in the sink. And when they go home, I hope they will see these home tasks as part of life, of "doing life", as a family...
But I cannot expect them to behave this way unless they first had a first hand experience.
Yes, this takes much more energy on my part...and there are days I don't want to train them...I really don't. It is so much easier to just turn on the TV. And believe me, I let myself do that...I'm no saint :D and I think it is ok to do so... but I do remind myself to count it a blessing to have this opportunity to 'do home' together and so...I press on...with God's help.
What I have learned from the days I have been able to find the focus, energy, time and patience to do this kind of training is this - my kids love it (most of the time) and they bring joy to my 'mundane' cycle...and even the days they hate it and give me an attitude, I am reminded that what seemed 'mundane' to me, is actually momentous - of great significance and having great consequence. There is indeed much deeper training going on....and it is part of our job to prepare them, to invite them into this HOME that is ours, and to 'do life' together.
- refilled your home's washrooms' toilet paper?
- cleaned the washroom?
- vacuumed?
- refilled the salt and sugar containers in the kitchen?
- folded your clothes after washing them?
- washed and changed your bed sheets?
- washed your house curtains?
- watered the lawn?
- refilled the soap and/or dish detergent?
Think of the last time you went to Costco/your local supermarket...What did you buy there? Aside from food...when was the last time you bought:
- pepper?
- soy sauce?
- oil?
- dish and laundry detergent?
- toilet paper?
- garbage bags (if you are like us, where we are required to use biodegradable ones)?
- toothpaste
I ask because lately I've notice these 'mundane' things I seem to do in an endless cycle...and these are things we can easily take for granted. Yes, we might do the laundry from time to time...but who makes sure the detergent is always there? Yes, we might refill the toilet paper when we need to...but who makes sure there is toilet paper in the closet? Yes, we might cook a meal or two...but who makes sure all the condiments are nicely available in the kitchen?
Sometimes I spend a day cleaning, washing and folding and sometimes I wonder..."will my husband notice the sheets are cleaner, the curtains are fresher looking and that every dispenser and bottle in the house is full of its contents?"
...and I admit, when he does notice...it is as if I had gotten a promotion at work!
But in the process of learning what it takes to keep a household running I have learned to not only appreciate my mom's job as I was growing up, but also the skills my parents taught me in the process...
You see, I think sometimes I as a parent focus so much on giving my kids opportunities to learn 'important' skills in life such as reading, writing, piano, swimming, etc., that it would be so easy to miss out on these other 'small' yet very important skills in life.
The other day I asked my husband, who is a wonderful handyman - "Who taught you how to fix lights? install faucets and build planters?"
...and then I realized someone else could easily ask me the same type of question - "Who taught you how to sew, mend, wash and clean the washroom with such speed?"
The answer -- observing our parents -- and in many occasions, being either told to do what they were doing and/or given the opportunities to do it.
Our parents might not have had college degrees -- some of our parents did not even have a High School Diploma. But they knew something - we, their kids, needed skills in life beyond formal education. They knew we will one day need to know the price of toilet paper because toilet paper always runs out in the house. They knew we will need to know how to wash and fold our clothes. They knew we will need to know how to clean a washroom and what products to use. They knew we would need to contribute to the welfare of the home...
...so now I think of my own kids....have I taken the time to guide them? the opportunity to try these skills in a safe environment? the chance to observe me instead of asking them to play with the neighbour while I do these things?
It takes time, patience (a lot of it!!!) and determination...but I suppose I need to remind myself...I am not only wanting to get these tasks done...I want to instil in my kids an appreciation of what HOME really means, of RESPONSIBILITY and OWNERSHIP, and to coach and train them to be well rounded people.
Even if they end up doing 'well' in life and are able to hire help, I hope they appreciate what maids, nannies, janitors and chefs do. When they see the janitor at the office at the end of their day, I hope they would have the decency to thank them for those 'small' jobs. That when they refill their coffees in the office kitchen I hope they will realize someone had to refill the jar they use. Even if there is someone who washes their coffee cups, I hope they will take the 30 seconds it takes to clean their own and maybe even whatever is in the sink. And when they go home, I hope they will see these home tasks as part of life, of "doing life", as a family...
But I cannot expect them to behave this way unless they first had a first hand experience.
Yes, this takes much more energy on my part...and there are days I don't want to train them...I really don't. It is so much easier to just turn on the TV. And believe me, I let myself do that...I'm no saint :D and I think it is ok to do so... but I do remind myself to count it a blessing to have this opportunity to 'do home' together and so...I press on...with God's help.
What I have learned from the days I have been able to find the focus, energy, time and patience to do this kind of training is this - my kids love it (most of the time) and they bring joy to my 'mundane' cycle...and even the days they hate it and give me an attitude, I am reminded that what seemed 'mundane' to me, is actually momentous - of great significance and having great consequence. There is indeed much deeper training going on....and it is part of our job to prepare them, to invite them into this HOME that is ours, and to 'do life' together.
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| Laundry Day - finally old enough to learn how mommy folds socks |
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| Adamant about learning too! |
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| They have been doing this for a while now -- pick your own socks and place them in your sock-box |
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| Dirty sock pile |
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| Shoes go inside after a day out |
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| Mommy folds but they place them back where the clothes belong |
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| PJs on the top drawer! |
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